Treasures

Sweetness.

Solitude.

Time for my mind to wander and dream.

Hugs.

Sunshine.

Being heard and understood.

Having the capacity to connect and hear another.

Fresh air.

Candlelight.

These are some of the elements that make my life feel blessed. These are the treasures that help me open my heart and remember the world is a safe and beautiful place.

Many of us, are still walking around with wounds. Old wounds from childhood that seem to diminish our capacity to live and be happy.

I am one of those wobbly, wounded humans. I believe that I will find my wholeness again. But days like yesterday remind me that making lasting change requires great love and also great patience.

Many people dismiss vegan as a diet, a lifestyle choice and an optional way of being.

But my experience has been that it is a calling, a heart yearning, a deep need from the depths of my being that will not go away until alignment comes.

Being told by well meaning doctors, teachers and family members that I would be sick and eventually die from being a vegan created deep chasms in my sense of self and my relationship with this world. It created inner doubt, a lack of trust in my own inner voice and also distrust to the “wisdom” of others.

I was often overcome with distress to think that killing innocent beautiful sentient creatures was required and essential for my health and wellbeing.

Never really knowing who to trust, how to live and what is true.

Instability and confusion and worry become normal.

Feeling like this world was innately cruel and heartless also became a dominant experience.

And for so long, I sincerely feared that I could not live in a way that honours this inner calling.

It seems ridiculous now, seeing so many happy healthy vegans in the world. But this doubt and fear and inner distrust was and is very real for me and I feel I have developed strong patterns of worry, doubt and confusion as a result.

The biggest pattern being that my needs, like my core need to live peacefully can not be fulfilled.

And as I finally walk my path of raw vegan alignment… I must face these fears and walk through them.

Seeing them for the illusion they are.

And forging my way to a happy value aligned life.

One day at a time.

One meal at a time.

One illusion at a time.

Seeing beyond the illusion to the treasures that await on the other side.

Treasures like, trust in myself.

And treasures like, knowing that being a happy healthy vegan is really possible and that I am living proof.

I am not yet there… but it’s nice that I feel like it’s possible and on the horizon.